Indeed, my neighbour, like you said, it's God's Will that we are living opposite to one another and being engaged now with the same friend Cancer. Your email is very encouraging to me and let's live strong my neighbour! With our prayers and God's blessing, no matter what tomorrow may hold for us, tomorrow will ONLY be a better day! Look at the Orchids that you have given us, they are so strong and so beautiful! The pleasure is really ours to have you and please drop by more often.
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Dearest Matthew and Esther,
Thank you for sharing your blog Matthew, I cannot say that it didn’t’ bring tears to my eyes, as did the article of Matthew in the Metro News (on 27th April, 2010).
Your positive attitude and zest for life is inspirational. I battle daily the sadness and fatigue I feel from my cancer. I don’t’ like to be “sick” and I don’t’ like to look “sick”. For me it’s been an 18 month journey that has changed my life in ways I cannot measure, I have made friends that will remain life friends, I know who are my true friends, but I have also lost friendships and family relations due to my cancer. Perhaps they just can’t “handle” it and have chosen to separate their lives from their own fears of death and dying.
My husband and children have been the reason I don’t’ lie in bed all day long and feel sorry for myself. Although my children are young, their understanding of my disease has shaped them into empathetic and compassionate individuals although only 4 and 7 years old, something I don’t’ think that I could have taught them but has come from living with their mommy that once did almost everything for them, then being in sick in hospital a couple of times, it was especially hard on my son since he couldn’t sleep without me. My children have learned to nurture me, and understand that I am still there Mommy and I can’t carry my son around and sometimes last year I did not have the energy to read them a bedtime story. My son even at 3 years old would sing to me “hush little baby” song, and rub my back soothing me and in his own way trying to comfort me. My daughter who understands all too much, of death and dying, knows that I have lost my own mother, her grandmother when I was only 6 years old. When I was diagnosed and she was 5 years old, asking if I was going to die when she turned 6 like my mother (her grandmother) had died when I was just 6 years old.
It has been a long journey for me and in so many ways still a journey. Although the doctors cannot guarantee me to be cancer free, and I myself have a hard time calling myself a survivor, I know that I have many blessings to count. The chemo and hard part in finished for me, and I am starting to look “normal” again, yet feeling “normal” again will be a challenge.
I believe that it is God Will that we crossed the street to be “nosy” neighbours the other day. Something in my heart has not been feeling right for many weeks now, before we even saw the ambulance at your house that night.
We will pray for you Matthew and Esther that God will continue to grant you peace in your hearts, and perhaps a selfish prayer of a longer time on this earth.
Looking forward to having tea with you one day soon!
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